i am not a writer. i am actually more of ranter...
Friday, October 24, 2008
For all you guys out there that have conquest issues.
When attempting to pick up a lesbian in a bar remember that she is a lesbian and does not want to hear about the size of your penis.
She will see right through your smarmy pick up lines because she has probably used them herself.
If you think you are clever, you aren't.
Nine times out of ten, if you meet a lesbian in a straight bar, she is there with friends. Do you really think she is interested in you?
If she had a dollar for every time a guy has said to her, "my wife is really into the lesbian porn thing, would you be interested in a three-way?" she would be really fucking rich. This does not mean she would take you up on your offer.
If you think along the lines that women are lesbians because they haven't met the right man yet, you are most assuredly not the right man.
Just because you like women too does not mean you are a lesbian. It means you are a heterosexual man.
If you want to buy her drinks, great! Don't assume that because you are buying her a drink she is interested in anything that has to do with you sexually.
If she says she is not interested generally this means she is not interested. REALLY. No hidden code there.
My mother said I always did things the hard way... she said I needed to learn to take the lemons life served up and make lemonade. I guess I am a lemonade maker. There are days when I look for someone with vodka, and then we just have a party, there are days when actually hucking the lemons is a better choice and then there are the glorious days when sitting down and having a nice, refreshing lemonade is just the thing.